


Inadequate

by Ruquas



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Fluff, Insecure Tony Stark, Insecurity, M/M, Scars, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-17
Updated: 2020-05-17
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:00:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24238438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ruquas/pseuds/Ruquas
Summary: Steve felt as if he was the one who should feel inadequate compared to them
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, James "Bucky" Barnes/Tony Stark, Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Comments: 4
Kudos: 217
Collections: Stuckony Server Bingo Collection





	Inadequate

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for the Stuckony Server Bingo (F1; Showing/Hiding Scars)
> 
> A big thank you at Lexi for looking over it that fast <3

The first time, Steve had slept with Tony, it had been… awkward. 

It was great. Perfect. And also strange. 

Theoretical, Steve _knew_ that Tony had scars. Probably a lot of them. He had been captured in Afghanistan, and several times before that. Steve also knew that Tony was insecure about them.

It had still been strange to be completely naked, kissing his boyfriend, slowly stretching him to prepare him for the final act while Tony still wore his undershirt.

Tony wasn’t called a genius for nothing, Steve was aware of that. But it still hurt to see the insecure look on Tony’s face which shattered a bit when he registered that Steve felt awkward, even after they had sex.

It still hurt when Tony stood up and going into the bathroom, mumbling something about a shower which was clearly a lie because the shower only started after forty-five minutes, after Steve had realized that Tony wouldn’t come out until Steve was still there.

They talked about it. It got better. But the shirt? It stayed and Steve tried his best to pretend that it didn’t hurt.

~*~*~*~

When they added Bucky to their relationship, Steve had thought that Tony would act the same with Bucky as with Steve.

When Steve asked him how Bucky handled that Tony wouldn't undress completely, the other man had just blinked at Tony and then shrugged.

"Don't know what you're talking about, punk." Bucky said, clearly irritated. And Steve? He felt as if someone had just dumped a bucket filled with ice over his head. 

"Uh… he… doesn't undress completely. Like, he leaves his undershirt on." Steve says, feeling a bit numb. 

Did that mean that Tony didn't trust Steve? Or that Tony thought that Steve would…. Would what? 

And even though Bucky was his best friend, his oldest friend, Steve felt jealous.

"Nah. Undresses completely. Or let's himself be undressed."

"Oh."

He was never really allowed to undress Tony. Tony always undressed himself.

"Don't take it personally. It's just… hard. It's even hard for me, and I've known you longer than I care to remember. I can imagine that it's even harder for Tony."

Steve didn't want to be angry. He really didn't. The way Bucky raised an eyebrow at him, challenging just like when they'd been kids and Bucky knew that Steve wanted to do something stupid, told Steve that there was still a lot of anger shown on his face.

"You looked at yourself?"

"What?"

Bucky sighed and shook his head, finally laying his book down.

"I have scars. Tony has scars. You? Perfect human being."

Steve frowned and nodded.

"Sure but I don't care about the scars. Not on you, not on Tony. They just show how strong you are."

"Sap. Point is, I know that. Tony knows that. Tony's lizard brain? Not so much. He needs time to work himself up to it. That's not a bad thing. That doesn't mean that he's not trusting you. It just means it's easier to let go of those insecurities when the other one has scars, too. You understand?"

Steve nodded, trying to comprehend everything. 

Bucky had scars. Tony had scars. Different ones but that didn't matter.

The alarm to assemble made it seem unimportant within milliseconds.

~*~*~*~

It was rare that they all had time. Time enough to not only fall in bed with the others, but to enjoy it, too.

Today was such a day. Weeks after he and Bucky had talked and got interrupted.

"Would it be okay if I draw you?" Steve asked because he was still tired from the last mission and also because he really wanted to. They had talked about it.

But having them both nod, Tony grinning like the cat that got the milk while Bucky blushed, that was exquisite. 

And then Tony started to pull off his undershirt. And froze as soon as he realized what he had done.

Steve could just stare at his sketchbook. He shouldn’t look. Tony hadn’t allowed him to look. He had only given Bucky that right and not Steve and now…

“Uhm… Cap? Steve?”

“Yes, Tony?”

Still not looking up. He hadn’t been given the permission, no matter how bad he wanted to. No matter how much Steve wanted to look at Tony, wanted to take in his boyfriend.

“You… you can look. if you want. I can also.. one second, let me just get my shirt, sorry, hadn’t thought of it and…”

“No. Please.” Steve hurried to say, his head snapping up. Tony stood there, looking to the ground. Looking beautiful.

The arc reactor shined a bit more than without the undershirt, highlighting the scars around it.

“Thank you.” Steve whispered, not knowing what else to say.

“You look even more perfect than I thought.”

Tony scoffed but didn’t answer. He neither picked up his shirt. Steve counted that as a win.

“Can I.. Is it still okay to draw you?” Steve asked because this? They hadn’t talked about it.

Tony hesitated shortly and then nodded.

“Sure, Cap. Just… no, forget it. Sure, no problem.”

Steve knew it was a problem for Tony. Bucky knew it. Tony knew it. But neither felt the need to call Tony out on it.

And he tried his best to capture them perfectly. Tony thrusting into Bucky, the shimmer of the arc reactor catching on the silver of Bucky’s arm, letting it glow a bit. Bucky nipping at Tony’s collarbone, playing with Tony’s nipples while swallowing every sound, always so careful not to touch the arc reactor, never to press too hard on the scars.

Steve felt as if he was the one who should feel inadequate compared to them. Not whatever Tony’s brain scrambled up.

~*~*~*~

It was difficult, afterwards. Steve tried not to stare too much, to take everything in in case someone took Tony away again. And Tony tried to put up a front.

But when Steve was allowed to kiss the scars that had been hidden from him all this time? Was allowed to show Tony how much he loved him, with scars or without them? 

He did his best to make Tony forget his scars and insecurities, even if it’s just for a short while.

**Author's Note:**

> If you have a request, [just visit my Tumblr and drop me a message](https://ruquas.tumblr.com/)


End file.
